Don’t stand in your own way.
There is nothing more frustrating than to realise you are self sabotaging. This article from NotSalmon, sheds some light and offers some guidance on how to stop.
It’s like this: As a child you learned habits on love and happiness from your parents. If you learned that love comes with yelling and insults, then being in a relationship with too much peace and too many compliments might actually inspire anxiety. Snagging an abundance of joy might also trigger you to self-sabotage your happiness in order to maintain that “masochistic equilibrium” which you learned in your childhood. Or you might simply choose scenarios from the get-go which bring you lower levels of love and bliss.
Full post here.